Obituaries

Wan Lin 林万明先生
B: 1960-05-06
D: 2018-08-15
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Lin 林万明先生, Wan
Anh Ngo 陳府吳莲英夫人
B: 1929-12-15
D: 2018-08-14
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Ngo 陳府吳莲英夫人, Anh
Anh Trương Hùng 張志雄先生
B: 1957-12-14
D: 2018-08-14
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Hùng 張志雄先生, Anh Trương
Thanh Lu 呂業成先生
B: 1931-04-24
D: 2018-08-12
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Lu 呂業成先生, Thanh
Man Wong 黄文光先生
B: 1949-02-10
D: 2018-08-11
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Wong 黄文光先生, Man
Robert Yee 余偉鈞先生
B: 1952-12-08
D: 2018-08-11
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Yee 余偉鈞先生, Robert
Zhong Cui 崔兆忠先生
B: 1941-01-15
D: 2018-08-10
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Cui 崔兆忠先生, Zhong
Miufan Wong 雷府黄妙薰夫人
B: 1939-03-29
D: 2018-08-06
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Wong 雷府黄妙薰夫人, Miufan
Anh Ly 陳府李鳳英夫人
B: 1939-04-19
D: 2018-08-05
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Ly 陳府李鳳英夫人, Anh
Mu Yang 楊木泉先生
B: 1938-11-07
D: 2018-08-04
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Yang 楊木泉先生, Mu
Wilson Lee 李錦雄先生
B: 1957-11-29
D: 2018-08-02
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Lee 李錦雄先生, Wilson
Mei Li 温府李美菊夫人
B: 1936-10-09
D: 2018-07-29
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Li 温府李美菊夫人, Mei
Muoi Tran 鄧府陳二妹夫人
B: 1952-08-02
D: 2018-07-27
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Tran 鄧府陳二妹夫人, Muoi
Rong Wen 温荣均先生
B: 1934-04-01
D: 2018-07-23
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Wen 温荣均先生, Rong
Huang Chen 陈晃洪先生
B: 1951-02-25
D: 2018-07-22
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Chen 陈晃洪先生, Huang
Tack Woo 胡培德先生
B: 1926-04-24
D: 2018-07-20
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Woo 胡培德先生, Tack
Pei Huang 温府黄佩仪夫人
B: 1930-05-01
D: 2018-07-19
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Huang 温府黄佩仪夫人, Pei
Minzhu Jiang 陳府江闽珠夫人
B: 1989-07-02
D: 2018-07-17
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Jiang 陳府江闽珠夫人, Minzhu
Min Zheng 林敏官先生
B: 1951-11-08
D: 2018-07-16
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Zheng 林敏官先生, Min
David Lin 董贤榕先生
B: 1957-08-15
D: 2018-07-15
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Lin 董贤榕先生, David
Dongfu Xu 徐东富先生
B: 1960-07-17
D: 2018-07-13
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Xu 徐东富先生, Dongfu

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Funeral Etiquette

Also known as social graces, the rules of etiquette ease us through challenging social situations. Most of us know how to behave in common circumstances but unless you've been to a lot of funerals, you may not know the rules of proper behavior in this often uncomfortable social situation.

The Basics of Funeral Etiquette

Emily Post once said, "Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others." Much of what we know today about etiquette comes from this woman, who published her first book of etiquette in 1922. When you use those words as your guide, the rules of funeral etiquette become easier to understand.

What to Wear

Tradition has always required a certain level of formality in dressing for a funeral. However, today's end-of-life services are so varied – ranging from the traditional funeral to the often more relaxed celebration-of-life – that it's challenging to know exactly what's expected of you.

The advisors on the Emily Post website tell readers that "attire isn't limited to just black or dark gray. Remember, though, that it is a serious occasion and your attire should reflect that, especially if you are participating in the service. At the very least it should be clean, neat, and pressed as for any other important occasion."

What to Say

No one expects you to say more than a few words and bereaved family members are often unable to give you their full attention anyway. So, keep it short and make it sincere.

"I'm so very sorry for your loss" may work very well. If you have time to add to those seven words, you might want to share a personal story about a time you shared with the deceased. But, watch closely for signs that your audience needs to move on to receive condolences from other funeral guests.

When speaking to other funeral guests, speak quietly. This is not a time to discuss business or share stories about your recent vacation. Instead, focus on sharing and listening to stories of times spent with the deceased.

What to Do

If you're unsure about what actions to take when being led by a pastor or celebrant, simply follow along. If you're not comfortable, don't draw attention to your unwillingness to participate. Be discrete and respectful of others.

Always leave your cell phone in the car or at the very least, turn it to vibrate mode or turn it off.

How to Handle the Visitation

A visitation, or viewing, is a time prior to the funeral where guests are invited to view the casketed body of the deceased. While it is customary to show your respects to the deceased by stepping up to the casket, you may not feel comfortable doing so. That's perfectly alright; no one wants you to be unnerved by the experience, so focus your attention instead on providing comfort to the bereaved family.

After the Funeral

If the deceased is to be buried following the service, the funeral officiant will announce the location of the interment. If the cemetery is not located on the grounds of the funeral home, there will be a processional of cars formed to escort the hearse to the cemetery. Unless they have chosen to have a private burial, those in attendance are welcome to join in the procession however, don't feel obligated to do so. You may simply leave the funeral at that time.

The Funeral Reception

Many families today hold a post-funeral gathering where food and refreshments are served. While this is a time to share memories, laughter, and even tears, your behavior at a funeral reception needs to remain respectful. 

Follow-up with Kindness

If you've not already done so, this is a good time to send the family a sympathy note or card. About a week after the funeral, pick up the phone to check in with them to see if there's anything they need.

"Good manners," wrote Emily Post, "reflect something from inside – an innate sense of consideration for others and respect for self." We think that just about sums it up; no matter the situation – wedding, baptism, dinner party or cocktails with friends – her observations about good manners (when followed) will serve us all well.

Sources:
www.emilypost.com